Tito, oil on canvas 20x16" . A special commission in progress.

I start with the eyes. That always makes them come to life and then I feel like they're monitoring the process start to finish. Speaking of starting things, during this piece I started listening to Ocean Vuong's "On Earth We're Briefly Gorgeous" and it struck me for a few reasons: 1. Perhaps a dog's only fault is their short life spans. 2. immediately this book launches into the complicated life of monarch butterflies and our personal monsters and.. the narrator is nicknamed Little Dog... who happened to be the subject of my studio attentions for the duration of the book.
I felt like I was entering the twilight zone wielding my paintbrush. 
There are few things artists find more challenging than rendering hands, ears and... black animals. 
My advice? From someone who never went to art school, take it from me. A black dog is really not a black dog. If you look at the palette  I posted on my instagram story, black was actually completely absent. Ultramarine and Burnt umber will take you far enough into the darkness.

There are certainly pet portrait artists concerned with picking out every whisker but I leave that business to the laser jets. 

​If you want a painting?
There is always room on this easel for dog portrait commissions. 
Now that my solo show 'Pink Lions Paper Crowns' is up at Cole Gallery, I'm looking forward to getting back to personal projects.
I have several loose ends to revisit and then onto some really weird new adventures I've been dreaming about for far too long.

 

Runaway Foxes, VI: With Ghost
24x18" oil on panel, available at Cole Gallery as part of my August 2022 solo show Pink Lions Paper Crowns

There will be days you cannot run away.
There will be days you are more ghost than girl.
….


“Worthiness is not earned, it is claimed.” It finally clicked. A quote from a yoga teacher rocketed me back in time.
I packed this piece two days ago to go to Cole Gallery for my solo show, after painting it almost a year ago.
When the first 5 in the Runaway Fox series left my studio, for the Vulpine Tap Room, my walls were missing them, but not as much as I was I was.
So I painted No. 6.
And it wasn’t working.


What do we do when a painting isn’t working?
I say it all the time:
We kill our darlings.
We paint over the parts that we loved because maybe that tiny corner isn’t serving the whole composition.
I did a lousy job painting over it.


Whatever. Onward. I’d fix it later.
Then, two foxes came racing, one after the other, bounding across the studio shouldering the ghost fox on the panel.
They boldly took their final poses. One flying high, the other, crash landing. Up. Down. And they didn’t frighten at the sight of the ghost who came before.


I learned many hard lessons from this year of incredible injury: a broken shoulder in the summer, a severe contusion to my sternum/clavicle that made breathing painful for months this winter, and most recently, a wildly painful ankle injury I have no explanation for.


As a marathoner, you see it all the time: people tied up in their PRs, FKTs, Ultrasignup ranks, defining themselves by their ability to run far and fast.
I was that way too, except I was using running to escape and numb what was too hard to confront in the moment. To outrun what I’ve spoken about as ‘bear days’.
I’ve learned over this year of doubt and pain that injury never took running away from me: I had mistakenly tied up self worth and identity in this activity.


You are so much more than what you can do, or used to be able to do.


There will be days you cannot run away.
There will be days you are more ghost than girl.


And now I understand what I was painting was about so long ago.

Little Wonders III: A Song to Sing in the Dark
16x12”
SOLD, before the piece is even finished 🔴
Hey @horijefe
I wrote this song about you.


I’ve spoken about Jeff before, he’s a musician & owner of @hiddenhandtattoo. He’s not just any tat artist. I call him the “grand daddy of the Seattle tattoo scene” - Find anyone who would disagree, I’ll wait.
To cut a long story short, as fate would have it, years ago I found myself under the needle of Jeff who brought the tiger on my leg to life I needed to see. Every. Day.
He even threw in some cherry blossoms, free hand. You wanna talk about trust??


Years later, I had visions for a sleeve telling the story of my life, with all the totems and important people who have become part of the 30+ year long chapters.


I wouldn’t trust anyone other than Jeff with this task:


A fox at my wrist gazing up at the moon, following a blaze of giant monarch butterflies, leading the way up to the mountains, into the crescent moon light on my shoulder… encountering a forest, marigolds and yes, even a unicorn on their journey toward the star-lit sky.


In my work, monarchs are fluttering beacons of hope in this sometimes dark world. Hope flutters in the dark.
That’s also where it begins.


When I heard Jeff has to battle stage 4 cancer, seeing my leg, my sleeve, he has been top of mind every day since. I learned a lot from Jeff, he is one of the only people outside my immediate family to see this journey of sharing my art from the onset. Always supportive and encouraging. Celebrating all the moments along the way.


I painted this piece as a tribute- half of the sale is being directly donated to his gofundme which you can find in his bio @horijefe .
Prints will be available in a few weeks with every sale above cost to print & ship being donated directly as well.


I’ll speak more on it when this is final. I wanted to share today as the original has just sold and I finally got to share it with Jeff.

Story time :
A coworker mentioned showing up an hour early on accident forgetting it wasnt Monday hours yesterday.


I told them I had once taken a day off in advance and accidentally showed up to work, they were like “clearly you didn’t have anything big planned.”


I don’t think parents understand me and my need to have a random day off without an agenda or obligation.
I suspect creatives might understand this.
Or maybe it’s just one of my quirks.


This morning it came to my attention that *I* don’t understand parents of human children. Check this out.
I was listening to the radio-  1 06.1FM,Jubil was taking advice on the confession line which I don’t normally pay any attention to but for some reason this caught mine because I was jamming out to  the song they were playing right before the talk segment. Anyway, this dad is on the line with a confession and a hack about how to take your child’s sass away here’s what he did. She was 9 years old and a serious Minecraft player , I’m no gamer. I played N64, we had mariokart growing up. Just mariokart. Anyway, while messing with his daughters phone, he accidentally deleted  3 worlds from her game. She was devastated. Instead of apologizing and taking responsibility for doing this himself- he takes the opportunity to tell his daughter, who has a bit of an attitude, that ‘sassy girls often have glitches in their computers …and that’s probably why it happened.’
The dad remarked this move worked  well: her behavior was swiftly checked for a few days.
I cannot with this!
My take? However you feel right now, you gotta know,
is an appropriate response to this world.


😂 It reminded me of my Royal Foxes shining those Savage Crowns.


“👑🦊 You’re like a little wild thing that was never sent to school. -M O


He’s a little moody. I think all of us has a little bit of the Royal in them… some are just a little better medicated, that’s all 😆.”




Mood and monsters, FOREVER!!!!✊






Tl;dr :However you’re feeling, right now is an appropriate response to this world. Don’t fall for toxic positivity. Everyone will always tell you to be happy. Part of my purpose in sharing my work and thoughts is advocating to normalize  the emotional spectrum. You’re a human. You’re entitled to the full range. It’s a package deal.

All I Need X 24x18” oil on panel

There are a hundred paths through the world that are easier than loving. 
But, who wants easier?
Mary Oliver

Part of my show next month @colegallery . Can’t wait to tell these stories.
You can pre purchase a few of these directly from colegallery.net 
Pink Lions Paper Crowns, August 2022❤️
​

New Tricks. Oil on panel 12x9”. 
SOLD 🔴 before the paint even dries
to a wonderful collector
🦊
I have learned that we cannot choose who we love in this world. 
I have learned you cannot trade your love for someone to love you back.

I have learned that there is a tiny keyhole in my chest and if you unlock it, paint and canvas and brushes fall out.

I have learned that there is a little girl with a paintbrush in my heart, and she has painted thousands of foxes about you.

I tried to tell you how much you mean to me
But all that came out was this painting.

And I hope you know,
It’s the lyrics to all your favorite songs.
And the words to all your favorite poems.
This is how I can tell you everything I don’t know how to say.

Learned some new tricks (and a whole new palette) in a workshop by @jen_art at @whidbeyislandfas last weekend finally got to finishing it! 
If you ever get the chance to learn from her you better jump on it. Worth every 💵!
​

Flight School Series: Run Before You Fly. 24x12” oil on panel. 



Site-wide sale is on until June 15th, subscribe to newsletter to get the discount code 💖


🌘🦊🦅



This is a story about a little fox who think the night will last forever. He makes friends with Moon and learned even on the darkest coldest night, even in the deepest fox hole, he isn’t alone. Raven teaches him to fly so he can be with Moon, his love. 
--
Dear little fox,
You don’t know me, but I’ve painted you moon-gazing for a very long time.


I can’t teach you to reach for the moon, all I can do
Is reach for it myself.
And so as the author of this story, I painted you a black bird, a professor of flight, to show you the way.
But first,
You need to learn to use the feet you have. 
Run before you fly.


Dear reader: 

💖How do we learn to do the impossible?
One step at a time.

This is just as much a love story as it is a story about learning you are capable of so much more than the limitations you set for yourself. 

Keep some room in your heart for the unimaginable. 
Keep some room on your for back
For wings.

🦅 To the moon 🌙,
Aliza
—--

How many foxes have I painted looking up at the moon? So many.
This imagery has been such a part of me it’s actually part of my tattoo sleeve (by the ink sorceror @horijefe !)


It was during the creation of this new series that I fully realized how important it was to create characters and scenes that make us feel more alive. 
✨
I’m looking forward to sharing the rest of this new story of mine. Original coming to Cole Gallery (@colegallery) as part of my August ’22 show! Available preorder via DM.

Flight School Series I. Oil on panel 30x24” Limited edition PRINTS NOW AVAILABLE (link in bio to shop!) And the June sale is ON tomorrow!
🌘🦊🦅


“You’re never going to kill storytelling because it’s built into the human plan. We come with it.”
--Margaret Atwood. 


And this one has been going on well before I started painting it.
This is a story about a little fox who think the night will last forever. He makes friends with Moon and learned even on the darkest coldest night, even in the deepest fox hole, he isn’t alone. Raven teaches him to fly so he can be with Moon, his love. 
How many foxes have I painted looking up at the moon? So many.
This imagery has been such a part of me it’s actually part of my tattoo sleeve (by the ink sorceror @horijefe !)


It wasn’t until a few months ago the storyline actually came together and I cannot wait to share it later this summer

Portrait by the indomitable @somerrunner 


How you do something shows your grit (Some say talent, I say there is no such thing). 
Why you do something reveals your character.

No, I don’t keep most of my work.
This gift of mine
Is for giving.

It’s Tuesday. It’s the first days of summer. It’s getting down to the wire finishing up the creatures for the big dance I’ve been working on for the last year of my life.

I woke up today and realized I’ve told 
many stories 
about foxes. All of these series: 
Little Talks, The Runaways, All I Need, Riot of Flowers, Flight School, The Royal 🦊

And I wonder if you knew
That most of them
Aren’t even about me. 

I’ll never really tell you what they’re about. They mean something to each one of you who has made a home for them, and I don’t want to pollute that with my own.

But I was listening to a Billie Eilish interview on David Letterman while I was wrestling with two large tigers and I’d like to talk about one tiny moment that wasn’t about Billie. 

It was about her brother, Fineas. 

As the duo gained popularity and acclaim, Fineas became known for song writing and producing genius and expressed his frustration over articles saying how it must be nice now to not “just “ be known as “Billie’s brother.”

What people might have missed in this quick blip was a moment where Billie shares she wanted to write a song about her not being here anymore. And how Fineas sharply objected. He wouldn’t indulge her in this endeavor. 
As anyone touched by sadness knows, when it’s too dark and you can’t see the light switch in the room you’re trapped in, sometimes you need someone else to turn it on for you. Or atleast, crack open a window.

“That’s all b-s. ‘Billie’s brother’ is all I EVER want to be.”

He’s not talking about being in the shadow of her success, he’s talking about her still being here to call her that.

I felt that.
​

The Runaway Fox Series. “No. 4”
Oil on canvas 24x24”
NEW LIMITED EDITION PRINTS AVAILABLE 
❤️ Check out the full collection in canvas print format on display in the Vulpine TapRoom !@lfpvulpine ✨
The good folks at Vulpine are doing the most to build community in LFP- swing by today to check out their pop up art market and support local artists!




——orig caption-


“I tell you this
to break your heart,
by which I mean only
that it break open and never close again
to the rest of the world.”-Mary Oliver


You are a witness to what’s happening right now. At the height of 2020, I wrote this to myself:
I think the me five years from now would look back and tell me in this moment:


You’re an overwhelmed nurse practitioner working during a pandemic that is disrupting life as we know it.


I’m telling you, in five years
You’re going to need all these stories you are a witness to. Write about what’s happening, especially the heartbreaking things. Paint the things you can’t help but paint: all the heartbreak you can’t find the words for.


These stories- your paintings, may just become your most prized treasures.
You will leave your story behind when it’s your time to go.


And you can be proud:
You had the courage to remember all of it and you were brave enough to share it.


Art connects and you have no idea who you might inspire to do whatever makes them come alive.
Keep doing your work.
And most importantly,
share.
🦊✌🏻


“What happens when people open their hearts?”
“They get better.” -H Murakami

Limited Edition Prints Now Available !
Pink Lions, Paper Crowns II. Oil on panel 40x30”, original available for my summer show @colegallery August ’22. 




Don't let
anybody tell you you can’t, or to not be afraid. 
 It's okay to be afraid
because you can't be brave or courageous
without fear.
The idea of being courageous is that
even though you're scared, you just do
the right thing anyway.


And that’s how I feel when it comes to standing in front of my work in public. The thought of doing so absolutely brings me to my knees but I know that if I want to be in the arena and telling my stories to the world, I need to be able to leave the safe bat cave of my studio to be part of the story.


Thank you for supporting me, and just know that it’s absolutely been worthwhile to show up and face the big scary world with all my monsters. 

Little Wonders. 20x16” available from @colegallery
/ colegallery.net
​


I was listening to a pod cast that really hit on the spirit of this little series of a tiger beholding some unexpected winged creatures. The podcast dug into the unfortunate consequences of what happens when people are disconnected from the natural world and our spiritual life, which is increasingly easier to do with our increasingly online and virtual lives.
But more importantly, and what caught my attention was the discussion of awe.
Awe usually happens when people are outside their comfort zone, experiencing something new and sometimes, when they’re in danger.

The world needs more awe.
That’s the essence of wonder. All spiritual life starts in wonder and where does this start, for most of us? Especially those of us who didn't grow up in the busy cities we now live in.
It often starts in nature.
Usually outdoors, when a child is crawling through the grass, turning over a rock and realizing for the first time maybe he or she is not alone in this world.
What you put on your walls affects you, every single day. The art you surround yourself matters so very much.
I know and feel so fortunate that my little monsters go to homes where they will be treasured.
Truly, I couldn’t ask for more than that.
Thank you for making room in your homes.
Thank you for keeping room in your hearts.
​Stay curious.

​Some girls are Malibu Barbie. I’m Wednesday Addams. Oil on panel 7x5” . SOLD.
“It’s funny to see a resurgence of rock and roll alt punk in fashion.
Vivien Westwood always said punk was a fashion aesthetic before it was a sound.
So I embraced that.
I think it’s great, I’m rooting for all that.
But at the same time, I kind of want to stick up for the underdogs.
I want to stick up for the people who got made fun for this, that got bullied for being like that.” - @modsun on his song ‘Rich Kids Ruin Everything’
I wish when I was a kid struggling with getting bullied for being different and wearing punk clothes and dying my hair pink that someone would have told me
‘The people that made fun of you and bullied you will one day be embracing everything that you were- the weird, the interesting, the outcast.’
I didn’t know Netflix was coming out with a show on Wednesday directed by one of my fav artists Tim Burton when I painted this.
I painted Wednesday because this character made me feel seen at a time in my life when my the few lady friends I had were starting to become obsessed with boys, MTV, and fashion. My guy friends were starting to treat me differently. And she made me feel like it was okay to be strange and unusual.

With all of the things that make up Wednesday- She’s a little wicked with a deadpan sarcastic charm, she’s got a steadfast ability to remain weird and different from other people and speak her mind. You have to admit, even if you don’t like Wednesday:
She is a force to be reckoned with.
Second photo? Grade 11 Aliza. By @somerrunner . Long live the outcast